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"I'm really not that different, you just made me think so."

What's up?

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mood: anxious
now playing: styx-renegade
vocabulary:

My yesterdays....

• Que paso? - 2006-09-10

Kristen's diary made me think a lot about Sean and me. I've stopped worrying so much. I still feel a twinge of jealousy when he mentions Cate Blanchett, but ultimately I don't worry so much, and when I do worry I find that I was wrong to be worrying at all, for the most part. I had liked him since I met him nearly 4 years ago and at that point I never thought I would actually get a chance to love him and be loved in return. The chance just wasn't there. I can also categorically say that had we been together then by some twist of fate that it would not have worked out. I am pretty much a different person than I was then in the way that I approach things, but obviously not in my tastes.

But for once..I am happy. I am unmistakably happy. Just being with him makes me feel a comfort that is one of the most incredible experiences in the world. The way Amanda put it, being able to rest my head on his chest and watch a movie is one of the greatest privileges that exists in this world. I would give up everything to be with him forever, but I couldn't call it a sacrifice because there is nothing in this world that means more to me than he does.

I don't know what I did to deserve this, but I am sure glad that I did.

Time to go fail a couple tests,

Jenn